Remember the Things You’ve Survived to Gain Courage
How looking back can help you move forward.
Hi there!
The day I lost my soulmate in a traffic accident, nothing else mattered.
I didn’t eat or sleep for days. My mind spun like a hurricane, with a constant fight between what I wanted to believe and the reality my mind couldn’t accept.
The day after Lizzy died, I told a friend, “If I can survive this, I can survive anything.”
And I was right.
Since then, I’ve been through a lot of tough times. Just last year, I helped my mom care for my 86-year-old dad through the last months of his life. I slept little, worked full time, and learned how difficult it is to change adult diapers.
Every day, I thought, “I can’t do this,” but then I got up and did what was needed. It’s amazing the strength you can find when a task is necessary.
“You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself, 'I lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along.'”
- Eleanor Roosevelt
Remembering what you survived
Some days, it feels like life throws trial after trial at you, every blow hitting before you’ve recovered from the last one. Add in a mental illness like bipolar disorder, and suddenly life feels unsurvivable.
I get it. I’ve been there several times in my 30-year journey with mental illness.
Through the hardest times, I learned that remembering the things I conquered in the past can give me the strength to face the next challenge.
There’s power in knowing what trials you beat before. When you know you’ve been in the darkest place and made it out, it gives you confidence to tackle your next problem.
One woman’s story
I watched a documentary a while ago about a woman who survived the killing fields of Cambodia in the late 1970s. She was eight years old, watched several of her siblings die, and got separated from her surviving family for nearly a week.
Alone in an unfamiliar forest for several days, she discovered the strength she had inside. The power she found has guided her through every trial she has faced since.
Most of us will face nothing as horrific as the killing fields, but we all have trauma in our past. Whatever your worst day was, you’re still here. You survived it, and that’s proof you can handle anything else life throws at you.
Look back to move forward
When you look back at the things you’ve been through, it’s often amazing to see how far you’ve come. Every experience, good or bad, has made you into the person you are today.
Each time you’ve faced a hurdle, you’ve come out stronger and more capable than before. Every painful event taught you lessons that make you wiser today.
When you’re feeling lost or scared or like you can’t go on, remember all the tough times you faced. Ponder how far you’ve come and how those dark days are now in the past.
I see this a lot on social media: You have already survived 100 percent of the worst things to happen to you.
Odds are excellent that you will conquer your latest challenge, too. Look back and reflect on how strong you are, and you’ll be unstoppable.
Journal Prompt: What was the last big challenge you conquered? How did you get through it? What does that teach you about your inner strength?
Creative Writing Prompt: Write a story about someone who lost everything. How do they rebuild their life? What gives them the courage to succeed?
Until next time, keep fighting.
Scott Ninneman
Additional Reading:
The book that started it all…
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Dear Scott, thank you for sharing this; it truly resonated with me.
I believe your perspective is invaluable—looking back at what you have already conquered can boost your confidence to tackle the next challenge. Sometimes, people need a reminder of their past achievements, as we often dismiss these accomplishments, and for various reasons, our minds naturally avoid dwelling on past struggles. However, this perspective serves as an incredibly positive force that can support us during dark times.
Great article. You’re right. The last big hurdle I jumped through was my wife’s cancer diagnosis. She had a tumor as big as an apple. We had to wait three long weeks for the surgery then on the night before the insurance said it wouldn’t cover it. Then about a week later with the oncologist’s help, the insurance agreed to cover it. The oncologist was unsure she got it all so
Jenny had a second surgery 5 weeks later. It seems to have not come back. Gee. I don’t think I knew how much we went through. We’re still seeing the PA but all looks good. It taught me to live in the present and appreciate Jenny more.