Burning the Bridge While Standing On It
How bipolar anger isolates you from the help you need.
Hi there, friend.
Years ago, I attended a summer lecture. The speaker insisted the room be kept at 62 degrees, which caused my hands and feet to cramp in pain. When the meeting ended, bipolar anger took over like a gremlin fed after midnight.
I marched up to the speaker and exploded. The worst words imaginable came screaming out of my mouth in front of everyone. The guilt and humiliation I felt afterward were agonizing. Once out of the building, I slunk back to my car like a puppy caught piddling on the rug.
Bipolar anger is a wildfire fueled by violent winds. It’s a corrosive acid that does more harm to the vessel storing it than anything it is poured on. Worst of all, it isolates you.
When your brain is on fire, you tend to attack the same people who are trying to help you. You burn the bridge while you are standing on it.
If you want to build a life where you can safely ask for help, you have to become incredibly mindful of your anger. Walk away. Count to 100. Seal your mouth with duct tape if you have to.
Let’s be honest: you won’t be successful every time, but the more you try, the better you will get. You may not be able to stop the anger from boiling up, but you can learn to control how it comes out. Protect your support system with all you can.
Journal Prompt
Think of a time your irritability or anger caused you to lash out at someone trying to help you. How can you step away next time before the explosion happens?
Until next time, keep fighting.
Scott Ninneman
This week’s theme post:
Scott Ninneman is the author of Speaking Bipolar’s 30 Days of Positivity, Anchored in the Storm (Guided Journal), and the writer behind SpeakingBipolar.com. Living in the mountains of southeast Tennessee, he spends his days crunching numbers as a tax preparer and his nights caring for his mother and writing stories about bipolar life. (And he loves pandas.)
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